I recently ran two surveys asking:

When it comes to ASKING for something... what's more important?
1... What you say.
2... How you say it.

And overwhelmingly, people said the how (tone of voice, etc.) is more important. 🤯

I was shocked.

Because I'm wondering...

- Well, what about written communication?
- People are always agonizing over finding the "perfect words!"
- Am I the only one who votes with what you say?

You can say something perfectly and still get a "no" because it was the wrong ask.

But you can totally fumble the delivery and still get a "yes" because you asked the right thing to the right person. (Timing is a whole thing, too!)

My hierarchy for asking:

1. Courage. Everything starts here. If you don’t ask, nothing else matters.
2. Words. Be clear + concise. Know what you want and say it simply.
3. Tone. Always helpful but won't save a weak or confusing message.

Ultimately we must ditch perfection. Focus on asking clearly and confidently.

Because what you ask and that you ask at all is what creates opportunity. (Do it more and more and get better and better.)